Why I would be a bomb-diggity acting instructor for children:
1. I have a pretty okay acting resume with lots of experience as an actor and a director
2. I know a shit ton of acting prep games, perfect for children
3. I have worked with children and enjoy it (need to update my clearances though)
4. I am a psychology major where one of my backgrounds are human development. Thus, I have a strong psychological backbone in child psychology and am very well aware of the cognitive abilities of different age groups and can easily prepare activities suitable for various age group.
So please, HIRE ME.
I can finally quit my job making burritos and dedicate my life to making coffee and teaching children how to act.
I met you once when we were babies.
I still can picture the image clearly in my head. You were a few months older than me in a little blue outfit. Your hair was raven. I was little, and in a red outfit with patches of blond hair.
17 years later.
My cousin calls my mother to tell her you’ve passed.
I don’t know who you are until my mom mentions the pictures.
Today, I founded out you were gay.
And I started to cry.
I ran down to my basement, and threw boxes around trying to find a copy of the picture. I need something right now, of that one interaction.
But I’m melting from the inside out, because I never got to know you.
You never got to know that little girl in the picture is gay too.
I’m too afraid to ask questions right now.
Geeze Louise
I’m kind of happy shit didn’t work out.
I was pushing some really cool people out of my life because I was so focused on her.
C’est la vie
Two.
One.
Your roommate is a fat cunt.
She needs to get the fuck over it. She won. We’re dust in the breeze.
She’s just mad she’ll never be as pretty, smart, ambitious, and as interesting as me.
At least I’m still in college.
And going for a degree that I have talent in and actual hopes of getting a job.
Two.
You’re almost 26 years old.
And you’re causing me to have to put on my grown up pants.
Are you fucking serious?
No one cares about your drama, so stop fucking whining. It’s really old from all the parties involved. Nothing is going to be solved. Ever.
So stop whining like a teenage girl.
Because watching a movie
about sex and romance is EXACTLY what I need.
Fuck that.
I’ll lock myself in my box instead.
I’m getting a fucking cavity.
This is kind of making me forget
that I want to punch every mother fucker going on about Rise Against.
When I was SUPPOSE to be there with a girl that stole my heart.
The funny thing about people stealing hearts is that its the process of losing shit.
In this case, 90 dollars since I’m too romantic for my own good.
(Do you have a vagina? Do you want a romantic girlfriend who buys you tickets to your favorite band’s show and gives it to you with a long stem red rose? Look no further! Apply today, while supplies lasts)
I don’t know why I did that
Maybe he’ll see what a dyke I am and leave me alone.
I can dream.
Ha
I don’t need you or your body.
Plenty of beautiful girls will let me draw them.
Like I need something else on my plate
Don’t wish to hard kids.
Sometimes what you wish for isn’t what you want.
And when it comes true, it’s a little too late to know that you had it really fucking good where it was at.
The hardest thing
is to tell you that you make my life an endless hell.
1.
